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3 Reasons Catholics Have Good Sex (Don’t Click Away Just Yet :))

Catholics are prudes, repressed, and think sex is a bad thing, right? Not so fast! Turns out Catholics may be having better sex than the rest of the world. Let me tell you why…

But first, no worries, this is not an inappropriate post. This is simply a look into God’s plan for sexuality, nothing offensive included. I promise :).

This is a post I’ve been wanting to write for a long time, because I think it’s incredibly important for others to know what Catholicism teaches about sex and why it holds these teachings.  And, whaddayaknow, when you follow God’s plan, joy ensues! God is so smart ;-).

3 Reasons Why Catholics Have Good Sex

I truly believe that when you follow the Catholic Church’s teachings on sexuality, you will enjoy the best experiences of sexuality that God intended us to have. By holding to the act’s original purpose, living chastely, removing barriers and freely giving of yourself to one person, you will be living the life God has called you to, and you will experience the true “joy of sex.”

1.  Catholics hold to the act’s ultimate purpose: procreation.

Catholics remember the purpose of sexual relations. Guess what society? It’s not about making yourself “feel good” by whatever means and whenever you please. By divorcing sex from its purpose—procreation—we have created a whole range of problems in our world.

When you have sex only to feel good, it leads to objectification of women (heard much about that lately?), partners feeling used and worthless as only an object of pleasure, and frankly, it takes the fun out of it.

Remember in high school when you could only sneak alone time with a boyfriend or girlfriend on occasion? It wasn’t just an “anytime you feel like it” affair. When you have to restrict yourself from sexual activity, because it’s not a married relationship or your spouse isn’t available, the time you do have together is all the more appreciated.

When you open yourself to the act’s true purpose, to create children, that causes you to wait until you are ready for children, and, thus, removes fear from the act, as well. You can enjoy it in its fullness, because whatever the act produces, you’re ready.

Finally, this is why the Church teaches that acting on attractions to the same sex is not God’s plan. Those actions cannot result in children and so it is not God’s intention. That is THE purpose for sex and the act must be open to it.

The Church welcomes anyone who feels attracted to the same sex; they simply ask that you don’t act on it. Many people in this world have disordered desires that are not anyone’s fault. You simply have to learn not to act on them with the support of others and to go to confession when you do. If you experience these feelings, this may be God calling you to the vocation of the single life.

2.  Catholics take out selfishness.

When it comes to sex, Catholics aren’t selfish. Sexuality is, again, not about pleasing ourselves. Sure, God made it pleasureable because he wanted us to “be fruitful and multiply,” and if it wasn’t appealing, it probably wouldn’t happen—at least not enough.

We’re already seeing societies who have declining birthrates and what a scary situation that is. Have you watched “The Handmaiden’s Tale”? That’ll give you a taste of what society might be like if we are no longer fruitful.

Sexual selfishness=masturbation. Again, if you can please yourself, whenever and wherever you want, you decrease the joy you experience when enjoying the act together with your spouse, as it was meant to be. By avoiding self-pleasure, you also store up that sexual desire and energy that can be spent with your spouse instead of wasted on a selfish act because you want it “right now.” Anticipation is a joy in itself!

Cut masturbation out of your life and see if your sexual relations with your spouse don’t improve.

Pornography is another example of selfish sexuality (and much more than that). You desire to feel pleasure right now, so you turn on the computer and off you go. Save it for your spouse.

Covenant Eyes is a great program that helps you put barriers in place to prevent you from this sexual temptation. Please note the link to Covenant Eyes is an affiliate link for which I may earn a commission if you make a purchase after clicking through; however, I only recommend products I know and love.

Here’s more about what I think Catholics Need to Know About Pornography.

Finally, abortion is the ultimate act of selfishness–what is convenient for me, me, me. While I understand the stresses and fear of unexpectedly becoming a parent, it is no justification for killing a human being. And again it divorces the act from its intention. If you can simply go “get rid of the baby” should you conceive one, the act becomes only about pleasing oneself.

3.  Catholics remove barriers like contraception, so men and women can fully give of themselves.

Catholicism Contraception - birth control pills

Catholicism’s teaching against contraception was definitely an issue I struggled with when joining the Church. I certainly understood the promotion of life and complete rejection of abortion, but why were birth control pills or condoms harmful?

The Church teaches that these methods put a barrier between the man and the woman. A husband and wife are a reflection of the Holy Trinity. Like the flow of love between God the Father and God the Son, Jesus, that fruitfully produces the Holy Spirit, so the flow of love between a husband and wife is meant to be fruitful with a child where God wills it.

When you put a barrier between that love, you stop God’s will from being done and from the possibility that it will be fruitful.

We co-operate with God in the creation of new life. It takes human effort—the sexual act between a man and a woman—partnering with God who grants that new life a soul to create a new human being. We cut God out of the equation when we limit sexual relations’ fruitfulness.

Also, I learned that birth control pills are actually classified as a carcinogen, meaning they cause cancer! Why would I want to put that in my body? And I also learned that the hormones you take in the pill thwart your desire for your spouse. That, too, is not part of God’s plan.

Stop with the pill—and all contraception—and again watch your sex life improve! This is reason No. 3 why Catholics are having good sex. 🙂

If you have a spouse who’s not up for getting rid of contraception, my advice would be to pray a novena to your favorite saint and then open a dialogue with your spouse and see what happens.

Additionally, if you do happen to conceive anyway when taking the pill, the hormones can keep the embryo from attaching to the uterine wall and thus abort the baby. What a horrifying thing that many women do not realize!

Catholics do teach a method that allows you to naturally avoid conception if you feel it’s not a good time for your family. If you’ve ever learned your fertility signals in an effort to HAVE children, you use the same signals to avoid conception. You simply avoid sexual relations the few days a month when your body is fertile.

When following the Church’s teaching, Catholics are open and free, enjoying their sexuality within a healthy committed married relationship—and I’m betting experiencing the best sex of anyone!

What do you think?

Of course, some men and women choose to give their sexuality as a gift to God in the imitation of Jesus, choosing to forgo sexual relations. What a wonderful—and abundantly fruitful—sacrifice!

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Pornography Addiction Help for Catholics

Pornography addiction help

There is no doubt that pornography is an epidemic in our culture. It’s become so commonplace that most of society sees it as no big deal. I was one of those a few years ago. What did it hurt if someone looked at a few images in the privacy of their own home? But it’s an addiction and where you do you find pornography addiction help?

Note: This post contains affiliate links for which I may earn a small commission to support the Catholic Newbie blog if you make a purchase after clicking through. Thanks for your support!

After reading so much more about this issue since converting to Catholicism, I understand why it’s bad for individuals … and bad for society. First, here are some things I think every Catholic needs to know about pornography followed by pornography addiction help and resources.

4 Things Catholics Need to Know About Pornography

1.  Pornography removes the purpose of God’s plan for sexual intimacy.

What was that plan? Procreation. Sure, he wants us to enjoy the uniting of one man and one woman, which is why sex is inherently good and pleasurable, but it must be used as God intended.

Pornography displays sex as simply for the act itself, as a way to derive as much pleasure from the act as we can while divorcing it from its real purpose, which is to bring life into the world between ONE man and ONE woman who are committed to one another.

By watching continued pornography, your view of sex is skewed, and you reduce the chances of having a normal sexual relationship with your current or future spouse. When you divorce sex from the creation of life, it has lost its meaning and its purpose and becomes disordered.

2.  Pornography harms those involved.

The people you are watching who are involved in these acts are not being treated as God’s children with dignity, value and fairness. They are being used as a vessel for or a means to another’s pleasure. They are likely not being paid fairly or treated nicely.

Pornography is a big business and some greedy person on the other end of the camera is the one who is abusing others and deriving all the monetary benefits. You are only furthering that evil and greed by participating as a viewer.

As a Christian, we should pray for those involved in this industry and do our part not to support it in any way.

3.  Pornography greatly harms children. 

Pornography is everywhere and our children are coming across it in droves. It harms them SO much. They immediately misunderstand what sex is about. They see it as simply a means to pleasure, and they will not understand all the disordered sexual activities they witness that others use to bring about worldly pleasure for themselves.

I recently learned that one of my kiddos had seen pornography — on YouTUBE, which is not supposed to have graphic material — and it had a tremendous impact on him. I am so sad that I will never be able to undo what he has seen, those visuals forever in his brain and the impact it will have on him as a man.

We must get rid of pornography parading about in nearly every medium, free, uncensored and easy to access.

4.  It’s a temptation.

Viewing pornography is a temptation to sin, just like any other temptation: gossiping, stealing, lying. To avoid falling prey to this temptation, either men or women, we must remove it from our lives.

I always teach my children that if you are tempted by something, don’t put it in front of you. If it’s not there, you can’t act on it. Shopaholic? Don’t go shopping.

Tell your spouse you have decided not to view pornography any more for accountability and hold to it. Place a filter like Net Nanny (they offer a 14-day free trial) on all devices both for  your kids and YOU. It will hold you accountable and keep you from viewing things you should not.

Place computers in public areas of your home, knowing you won’t view objectionable material in front of your family. If you fall, resolve not to do it again, go to confession to seek forgiveness and try, try again.

5. There IS help.

You are far from alone in battling this temptation, and plenty of great Catholic programs, many of them free, exist to help you overcome the desire to view pornography whether you’re in Pittsburgh, PA or Seattle, Washington. There are so many people who suffer from this in silence all around the world that we may never know.

Here are some outstanding resources to get started.

Catholic Pornography Addiction Help & Resources

If you view pornography, today is the day to stop this addictive habit. First, acknowledge and understand why it is a problem and then begin the process of getting help.

Let us pray for everyone who is tempted by pornography and especially our children who have been exposed!

Is pornography an issue in your life or in your family? Have you been able to kick the pornography addiction habit?

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5 Ways to Participate in the March for Life from Home

5 Ways to Participate in March for Life from Home via @ACatholicNewbie

Teresa Tomeo with Catholic Daughters of America

With blizzard-like weather predictions, it seems many will be missing the March for Life rally Jan. 22. While it’s disappointing not to be there to show your support and make your voice heard in person, there are still lots of ways to join in from home. I’ve got 5 ways you can participate in the efforts to respect and preserve all life from birth to natural death right here:

  1. Pray! This is probably the most important way you can help the pro life movement from your home. Pray for:
    • a successful event
    • good weather
    • the speakers, journalists and reporters who will be braving the weather and sharing the stories from the ground
    • for safe travels for all those traveling to and from the event
    • that politicians will not just hear, but listen, and have their hearts opened to the sacredness of life
    •  that God will transform the hearts of many as the result of this event
    • for those considering an abortion that they will choose life
    • for healing for those who have had an abortion
  2. Watch or listen to the coverage on EWTN television or radio – If you can’t be there in person and want to see the event from start to finish, the Eternal Word Television Network (EWTN) is your solution. EWTN will be covering the March for Life in Washington, DC all day long, beginning at 9 a.m., including the opening mass on Jan. 21 at 6 p.m. ET. EWTN Global Catholic Radio, which is also on Sirius 130, will also be covering the March. You’ll feel just like you are there, except you won’t be as cold or as snow covered :).
  3. Tweet, post and pin! Help get the word out about the sacredness of life to all those on social media. Let’s take over the social media world for the day of January 22 and show the world how many people care about the sacredness of life. Follow @March_for_Life, @TeresaTomeo & @EWTN on social media for live coverage, photos and videos of the event. Use hashtags as follows to join in the conversation:
    • #MFL2016
    • March for Life
    • #ProLifeProWoman
    • #ProLifeGen
    • #YouthforLife
    • #Youth4life
    • #RighttoLife
    • #DefundPP
    • #ProLifeYouth
    • #Life
    • #LetLifeWin
    • #EWTNRocksMFL
    • #SavetheBabies
    • #WhyWeMarch
    • #savethebabies
    • #prolife
    • #righttolife
    • #StandupforLife
  4. Support Pro-Life efforts – Could you make a donation to your favorite pro-life organization on Jan. 22? Or purchase a pro-life book like the new “Abolishing Abortion” by Fr. Frank Pavone of Priests for Life or support EWTN in thanks for the coverage they are offering?
  5. Take Action – Now that you’ve seen all the people who believe in life, are you ready to do your part in the campaign to end abortion? March for Life offers some concrete steps you can take immediately, including prayer outside abortion clinics, writing your legislator, spearheading pro-life efforts in your parish and more.

Will you be watching the March for Life from home this year or will you be attending? Let me know!

Tweet These Companies that Support Planned Parenthood

 

Twitter Accounts for Companies who Support Planned Parenthood via @ACatholicNewbie

Not only should the U.S. government defund Planned Parenthood, we must reach out to companies that we frequent and demand they stop funding Planned Parenthood, as well.

By all means, send them emails and letters! But I think the easiest action you can start with is to bombard them on Twitter. I’ve compiled a partial list of Twitter accounts for the most well-known companies compiled by eVALUEator that support Planned Parenthood and drafted a sample tweet for you. All you have to do is copy and paste the tweet and fill in the name of the Twitter account of the company you are contacting.

Acccording to eVALUEator, a company that assists financial professionals to help their clients match their moral convictions, Planned Parenthood is 50 percent funded by the government and 25 percent funded from corporate sponsorship. They warn that many of these companies may be part of your retirement plans and they are listed on the S&P 500 and Fortune 500. So be aware and make sure you are not supporting them as an investor!

According to eVALUEator, the companies on their list have given corporate donations or sponsored an event within the last five years. This list comes from eVALUEator’s proprietary database, which has been developed over the past 20 years to get a clear picture of how companies employ their corporate assets.  eVALUEator says it seeks to: “remove all funding associated with abortion, abortifacients, fetal-tissue research, and all endeavors that seek to destroy human life.”

Let’s encourage these companies to stop funding abortions and the sale of baby body parts and let them know that otherwise, they will lose the support of the huge numbers of Christians!

Click this link to tweet the below (just change out @HomeDepot — or @Adobe) with the Twitter account of the company you are targeting):

Tweet: Stop funding #PlannedParenthood, @HomeDepot! #ChristiansUnite #DefundPP #PPSellsBabyParts

  • Adobe – @Adobe & @AdobeCare
  • Anheuser-Busch – @anheuserbusch
  • AOL – @AOL
  • Bank of America – @BankofAmerica @BOfA_Help
  • Bayer AG – @Bayer
  • Charles Schwab Foundation – @CharlesSchwab @SchwabService #OwnYourTomorrow – They contacted me to note their funding is through matching funds of employees who select Planned Parenthood as a charity (8/6).
  • Chevron – @Chevron
  • CIGNA – @CIGNA @CIGNAQuestions
  • Coca Cola Company – @CocaCola (They have now said they will no longer fund Planned Parenthood)
  • Daimler AG – @Daimler
  • eBay Inc – @EBay @AskeBay
  • Eli Lilly and Company – @EliLillyCo @LillyPad
  • Ernst & Young – @EYNews
  • Estee Lauder – @EsteeLauder
  • Freddie Mac – @FreddieMac
  • Fannie Mae – @FannieMae
  • Gap Inc. – @GapInc
  • GE – @GeneralElectric
  • GlaxoSmithKline – @GSK @GSKUS #GlaxoSmithKline
  • Goldman Sachs – @GoldmanSachs
  • Hillshire Brands – @HillshireBrands @TysonFoods #HillshireFoods
  • Home Depot – @HomeDepot #LetsdoThis – Come on @HomeDepot #DefundPlannedParenthood. #LetsDoThis ! #PPSellsBabyParts
  • Johnson & Johnson – @JNJCares (do you really?) @JNJParents @JNJNews
  • JPMorgan Chase – @JPMorgan
  • Laboratory Corp of America – @LabCorp
  • Lions Gate Entertainment – @LionsgateMovies
  • Macy’s – @Macys
  • Marriott International – @Marriott #travelBrilliantly
  • McKesson Corporation – @McKesson
  • Meredith Corporation – @MeredithCorp
  • New York Times Company – @NYTimes
  • Nike – @Nike #JustDoIt – Come on @Nike! STOP funding #PlannedParenthood! #JustDoIt #PPSellsBabyParts
  • Office Depot – @OfficeDepot
  • Playboy Enterprises – @Playboy
  • Pricewaterhousecoopers – @pwc_llp
  • Procter & Gamble – @ProcterGamble @PGEveryday @PGBeauty #ProcterGamble
  • Southwest Airlines – @SouthwestAir #SouthwestHeart – Show some #heart @SouthwestAir! Stop funding #PlannedParenthood @SouthwestAir #SouthwestHeart
  • Staples – @Staples #MakeMoreHappen
  • Starbucks – @Starbucks
  • Tenet Healthcare – @TenetHealth
  • Tiffany & Co – @tiffanyandco
  • Time Warner – @TWC @TWC_Help
  • Tripadvisor – @TripAdvisor
  • Unilever – @Unilever #SustLiving
  • UPS – @UPS
  • Verizon – @Verizon @VerizonNews @VerizonSupport
  • Walt Disney Company – @Disney @WaltDisneyWorld
  • Wells Fargo & Co – @WellsFargo @WellsFargoNews @Ask_WellsFargo
  • Whole Foods Market – @WholeFoods

Let’s show them what we believe in and get them to stop funding this terrible organization! There is power in numbers!

 

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